It all began one day over a cup of tea......
"Let's go to crochet class," I suggested to my friend.
It must have been one of my more impulsive days here on planet Earth....the planets must have been aligning in some crazy weird position that day. I had been searching for new ideas and something different to make. My childrens school fete was approaching and that always sparks rollercoaster ride type thoughts in my creative brain.
I began flicking through pages of my extremely large collection of decorating books looking for inspiration.
I turned a page and THERE IT WAS !! The prettiest antique inspired milk jug covers.
I had much admired the art of crochet. I absolutely adore antique lace. I buy mountains of it in every shade and every design. A few inches or by the metre, I am really not fussy at all. I loooove the thought of women centuries ago handmaking lace to sew on to their pretty home made dresses. The whole idea just seems so romantic and wholesome and beautiful. Visions of yards of lace flashed before me and before you know it I had enrolled myself in a class run by an old lady. My friend had began the class a few weeks before me and was really enjoying it.
Yes !! I would love it as well !
and so it began.....
Week after week on a Saturday afternoon we would sit with a group of lovely.....if somewhat nutty old ladies and crochet. My friend took to it like a duck to water. She sat happily at the table and the pretty cottons slipped through her nimble fingers and whipped up gorgeous crochet edges. She quickly progressed to more difficult patterns and knitting.
WELL.....my story was a little different. My first lesson went along nicely. I had been asked to bring along a facecloth to crochet around. Repetitive stitches were necessary until I picked up the hang of it. I went round and around a plain white cloth and was quite chuffed with my efforts. This was a walk in the park, surely I was ready for the next step......
On my second lesson I mentioned my thoughts to the elderly teacher. "Too easy you say !," she said
AND THEN IT HAPPENED
the moment that stopped my crochet career.
She TRIED...to teach me a stitch called a picket. Oh my gosh....by the end of the first row I wanted to rip my pickets apart and throw them over the fence. I wanted the clock to mysteriously move forward to pack up time. Minutes rolled into hours and sweat gathered on my frazzled brow. Please let this rotten class be over RIGHT NOW !!
My friend continued to happily chat away to the other ladies who were knitting odd dolls out of very "interesting" shades of wool. I looked over at her in despair wanting her to come and save me from this torture.
All the while the elderly teacher sat and didn't say a word to me. I'm figuring she thought that she would teach the new girl a lesson and put her in her place.
Finally, after two hours of moving a total of ten centimetres around my cloth the afternoon came to an end. If I could have pushed a button I would have catapulted myself out of the roof like batman does in his batmobile.
The torture was over. I was the first one out the door....
a few more weeks passed by. I had discovered a "lovely,simple" pattern for my milkjug covers that was Peachy Pink fumble proof and I managed to master the art very quickly. I churned out milkjug covers like a true professional. I attached pretty beads and loved my finished product.
Eventually I tired of the whole affair and packed my hook and threads into a little basket.
I will definately give it a go again some day. I still would love to learn how to make lace. Surely it can't be all that hard.......or can it ???
Moral of the story
Don't walk before you learn to crawl
there are plenty of antique milkjug covers out there in the shops that are ready made and desperately looking for homes.
NEVER EVER complain to aging post menapausal women about something being too easy
ALWAYS put a sock in my mouth before I speak my mind
One of my very pretty creations.
I simply overlocked around a circle or square of pretty cotton fabric. Then I crochet'ed around and around my square, attached the pretty pink beads and gave it a press with the iron.